so, i was convinced to start writing online so that i could keep track of this big adventure that i have been invited to go on.. yes.. an amazing trip that i don't even think i'll be able to believe is real until we are there! it's funny that i don't write on here more often, i mean really.. this will probably only capture 1/4 of what goes on in my big swedish head..
first though.. today i found out that something that happened last spring on my mom's last farm has been named one of the cruelest acts against animals ever!! check this out...http://www.mcall.com/news/local/all-a1_3animal.5815416apr24,0,588640.story?coll=all-news-hed... nuts.. its a sad thing that we don't talk about too much anymore.. i hate to think that anyone thinks that this is alright.. i remember farm sitting and going down to the field every hour to check on the new babies that were born after this happened..scared out of my mind that these losers would return...
anyway.. my trip.. or "our" trip- jenny and i are going to dublin, paris, zurich, munich, berlin, sweden, norway, copenhagen, london.. wow.. i am bursting with excitement.. it sounds nuts, but choosing with no more regrets and the convincing of miss jenny.. the slow process of taking nursing boards in this state.. and.. well, just my desire to see more, and get out there to explore more of the beautiful world has validated this! ( i seriously was just so happy to hang out and help on the farm, or find an empty beach..but)
sleeping on trains, beautiful countryside.. waterfalls.. new faces.. museums.. culture.. the midnight sun.. living out of my backpack... ahhhh...... it's amazing how doing this trip in a cheaper fashion has added on a few countries... (maybe they need new nurses in sweden..hmm..)anyone want to join us!??!!
i know myself.. once i start working, i will devote so much of me to nursing, its so important to me to be a good nurse, it's something i have wanted for so long.. i think that i am so lucky to have such an opportunity.. and i can't believe that it's here.. one of the reasons why i chose nursing was because you can do it anywhere.. you can travel all over, and explore.. to do this while helping out the shortage, and patients.. well, what could be better, a career where every day is different, challenging, and in high demand.. but my career can't be everything, so first, it's time to start to unravel my feelings of being so cooped up lately!
much has been due to the necessities of projects, papers.. that i let get the best of me over the past month..
too much of me.. it's funny, everyone is saying let's go party.. drink.. and party i will, with my family who i never see.. and friends too...
all i have wanted to do is to be outside.. and get some fresh air! i started this with some great walks last weekend.. had numerous catches with my dad.. my random new activity..he gets such a kick out of it.. (because i throw like a girl.. ) and since saturday i have clocked 27 miles of walking.. yes, walking... i keep thinking, get in gear mia.. you should be running these miles for a cause or something! i guess i miss running with my daisy a lot.. she used to drag me every day!! .... now if i could only kidnap holly from the farm..
don't get me wrong, actually celebrating with everyone is fantastic, and sad, so much i will miss.. but i'm ready for a new challenge, and hopefully will finally start acting like myself again! i feel like i have been so closed off.. for a few reasons, but those are behind me now, thankfully...
I feel like every time i have met someone new, i have acted so wierd.. shy, almost coming off as immature and just flakey..( my friends say.. don't act like shy mia..) i think i have been way too obsessed with insecurities and such.. but why let that get the best of me? its crazy how feelings get manifested sometimes! i find myself reflecting saying.. mia.. ugg.. or.. i wish that had happened on a different day, week.. etc.. i am constantly blaming myself for all that doesn't work out.. something i must work on before i start working... people sometimes would ask me why i looked so busy at clinicals.. well, i was trying to get to know my patient as a whole.. talking.. fully assessing.. taking advantage of the experience.. why can't i be that real with new people i meet outside of there!! i am beginning to let my guard down.. just a little slow for now
so when i started typing tonight i was just going to write about something very silly that happened today.. i guess i never shut up..
time to sleep.. tomorrow is our last day of nclex review, so official last day of school.. this has been my full time job, with 73 others for the past 15 months.. they said they owned us on the first day, definitely true, but now we're free.
thankfully i don't think anyone will read this, so mia babbles on with way too much punctuation as usual!!
smiles..
